A friend of mine asked me to give them a ride to a job interview today. I was working from home and could squeeze it into my lunch, so I figured, sure why not. I'm a nice person. I help my friends out when I can. That being said, I still feel a certain way about doing favors for people. I don't mind doing someone a favor. I'm happy to help out when I can because I consider myself fortunate to even be able to help them out. At the same time, I don't like it when people take advantage of the fact that I'm helping them out and are disrespectful in the process. Just makes me not want to do anything for them ever again.
When someone is doing me a favor, I try to make it as easy and convenient for them as possible because they are going out of their way to help me out. I try to be where I tell them I'm going to be when I say I'm going to be there and ready and if I'm not going to make it, then I do my best to let them know in advance. I hate when people waste my time and I really truly despise with every fiber of my being waiting around on people when I hadn't planned on it and this is why. When it comes to my time, it's just that MINE. I should be able to decide how I spend it as I see fit. It drives me up the wall when other people take that decision away from me. It's like, who are you and what makes your time so much more important than mine? It's really a form of arrogance on top of being extremely disrespectful. How would you like it if I reached in your pocket, took $20 and used to buy myself some dinner? I didn't even bother to ask if you might have been planning to use that $20 for something or offer you some of my food at the very least while I'm sittin here eating it in your face. Just disregarded you all together. Disrespectful right? Well, it's practically the same thing, difference is, you can get money back.
So back to my story. I bring this individual to their job interview and they ask me to wait a minute while they go inside. I assume it's to try and make sure its the right place and all that before I drive off. Cool, no biggie. I wait. They come back out and tell me they just have to fill out some paper work so it's not really an interview. Say it will just take 5 minutes. Cool, no biggie. I wait. I wait 5 min. then 10 min, then 18 minutes.... WTF?!?!? Needless to say I was quite irritated. I go in (mind you the door is only a few yards from the car) and see this person sitting down filling out some paper work. In my mind I'm a little perplexed. Now they tell me they are almost done, another 5 minutes. (!!!???!!!) Really? so another 20 is what you are saying? Course I didn't say that. I left, hopped in my car and went to subway. I was actually considering not going back, that's how through I was. But I figured at the very least they could sit there and wait just for me like I had to.
So how could this situation played out differently and not left me feeling like I have to think twice about ever doing this person a favor ever again? It's actually quite simple. After 5 minutes, or even 10 minutes, they could have taken 30 seconds to come out to the car and tell me it was going to take a little longer. Then LET ME DECIDE if I want to wait or if I need to go. Granted, they may have had to take the bus home, but that was the plan from the beginning. But at least they would not have been disrespectful.
The sad part is I don't even feel like I can say anything to this person, because I know they won't understand how they were disrespectful or what they could have done differently. All I would get is excuses as to why they didn't and that would piss me off even more... So I have to blog about it.
Disrespectful!!!!! He definitely should have come out and said how long he would be after it was LONGER than 5minutes. If people don't respect your time they will never respect the relationship or you.
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